For those who are standing in the shadows with me.

So this is how it goes.
You have a vision. A very real commission in this life.
And you try a little. Just a very little. To make it happen.
Then the problem is, all the people you know don't GET your vision, and in fact, they think other things matter a lot more. You begin to feel you're worth nothing. Because you don't tick their boxes. No well paying job. No this. No that.
So you wander away from the vision and you try to get a this or a that or two, and you get a job ...

... then the job makes you sick. And you are lame, and full of tears.

In the end, you remember. You had a vision.

Today, I am in a quiet, dark but peaceful place. Afraid, I will admit, hiding from the people who see only failure. Wanting so much to step out into the sunlight of my own success. Too scared to do that.

Just needing to take baby, baby steps towards doing just what I am meant to do. Needing to draw the map, sketch in the compass, and take a step or two down the first path. Again.

This place was a gift from God - how we came to be here not much short of a miracle - and now I need to seal the deal - I need to turn it into the precious teaching learning living breathing fabulous resource it can be.

Takes deep breath, makes vast mug of tea, and sets bread to rise. Here we go then.


Ellen said...

Those of us in the shadows with you, my dear, are quietly cheering you on. And maybe one day, I'll have the courage to step out of the shadows, too.

Paula said...

definitely cheering you on Jackie! Follow YOUR heart, the one God gave YOU - not the ones around you pushing you into their moulds.

suzanne said...

I hope you have rested and ready to pick up your dream to begin again..I think one has to get into the rhythm. You cannot force it and you have to wait for it to reach you. No harm in taking a long breath and gaining inspiration again.

Wishing you all the best
Warm regards

Sister Lori said...


I know just what you mean. It's not easy taking a lesser traveled road. And those that aren't interested in that same direction, are too afraid to encourage you. They want to keep us all in their comfy little cublicle.

Just keep on keeping on. There are plenty of us out here that will encourage you in the failures and rejoice in your successes. And pray for you always.

God be with thee!
Sister Lori

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