When the answer is 'both'

We have been struggling to keep up of late.

I'm working more hours, the girls have exams, the garden is getting away from us, and as for the field!

We've a possible move on the cards - to a tiny house but one we might own in part - but we can't know if that is either possible or the right thing to do, as yet.

I have stayed awake long hours praying and listening on this. Should I give up this job? It's stopping us from living out our agrarian calling.

Should I keep this job? It's helping to keep us afloat financially.

Should we stay here, where we feel called to things we have not yet achieved.

Should we bust a gut and break ourselves to move, and break the bondage and poor stewardship of excessive rent.

Work or farm? Home or House? Earn or Produce?

Right now, all I ever hear is : both.

And that's too hard.