How many return trips to the drawing board?

I spent spring and summer trying to make the box scheme happen.
To understand what that means, you have to understand that starting the box scheme, did not in the first place involve growing much veg. I entailed signing up members to the scheme, which we would supply this year mainly from a wholesaler, and as we gathered steam, it would be worth planting the crops to supply the scheme next year.
So when I could have been planting and tending, I was handing out leaflets and writing promotional material.
We have had not one single person even make a serious enquiry. Members? Zero.
I have organsed an Introduction to Permaculture in October, and as yet, we have no takers for that, either. And what's more, it may be just as well, as I haven't been keeping up the gardens, and the field's a blooming disaster area. The polytunnel is weed jungle. And what's more, dislike it as I may, it looks as if I may well have to go right back to the telephone sales work. In order to survive.
I do wonder, sometimes, how many trips back around the drawing board it is going to take to get it through my thick head...

Today, we spent too long with accounts and calculators and lists - and discovered that due to some changes coming up - we are going to be £450 a month worse off, until April when that will become £550 - or possibly more.
In our desire to make something big happen, we have forgotten the original game plan - which was self sufficiency first and foremost, and now, when we most need to be able to live on nothing and a bit, we can't, because we're just not set up as we know we could be.

Somehow, in a short space of time, we have to get as much of the garden and other land as we feasibly can, up and running to support us. We're going to have to abandon plans for green businesses and community supported agriculture - unless we move somewhere where people actually give a darn - and just get our heads down and survive.

We've had a great year for kids - 6 females and only 2 males, and they are all adorable - but it looks as if we will have to sell some mummy/baby combos, as that many goats - well, is just too many!

We are this close to losing everything. Which kind of focuses the mind. Most of the sheep will be sold next week. Which will buy us some time.

I wish I'd planted more onions *


*not bad for last words. I hope they're not. My last words I mean. At least, not this time.


Jan said...

Trying really hard not to be tempted to buy a couple of goats...
Megan's been nagging for goats for just ages, and yours look very lovely :)
I shouldn't think they'd enjoy the journey from Wiltshire to Yorkshire though.

Ellen said...

I second Jan, and am also sure the goats wouldn't like a trip across the pond.

You are really on my mind, Jackie. I know how frustrated I get when my well-made plans seem to fall to ashes at my feet. Your dreams and ideas are marvelous, though; keep them alive. Wish I could have you over for some tea and cake.

Jackie said...

Not sure the Atlantic's a good idea, Ellen,but Yorkshire wouldn't be a problem - Jan.
All our goats are named after fabrics, and Lace (known as Lacey) and her single daughter Muslin (Muzly) would be lovely for a Mummy and Daughter!

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