So, positive thinking. It's a good thing, yes? Well.Yes. Unless ...
I'm beginning to think that positive thinking, like alcohol and money, can be good for you , or bad for you, depending on your personality type.
I've spent many years trying very hard to do the whole positive thinking thing. I was trained at the best Customer Contact company in the world. The words 'Be * Do * Have' were engraved on my heart.
It's stopped me.
I've made everything complicated. I've not done the simple things, because of course, I must do the big thing. I've taken on big courses - which now I have to do - to aim for big things. Because I've been trained to believe I can be the best, the biggest, the star - I've rejected being OK, and happy with it.
When you're trained to think like that, it can get to the stage where you sabotage the small things, because they are not the big things. You don't allow God to take hold of the seed and make it grow. You kill the seed, just for not being the tree.
So this is my year of small things. I simply want to grasp each small moment, cherish each small prize.
I have four ideas for 2011 - and they are :
- work - don't talk and plan things, don't draw any more diagrams, get out there, and work on things.
- sew - get back to proper dressmaking
- decorate - make the house OK - comes from a time when I did this and felt good.
- complete - tie up the loose ends. Tidy things up.
- work - rather than planning great things, rebuilding the box scheme from scratch - my small step is to grow what we need, and sell surplus via the Country Market.
- sew -rather than always trying to do something original, cleverly crafted, and ending up stuck - my small step is to do something I can do - plain straightforward dressmaking, as I was taught in school. With a pattern. And fabric, bought for the job.
- decorate - rather than dreaming over total overhauls here and there, concentrate on the small patch ups that are needed. I can make curtains, by the way, rather well. Haven't made a single pair for this house, yet.
- complete - there are so many loose ends and odd things in my life I can't tie up. Symbolically, I'd like to tie up some of those I can. A dozen or more part completed craft projects are blocking creative flow ... so it's can them or complete them. I've started on one already.
2011 - My year of small things